self diagnosis

Dream -

I'm entertaining gorgeous baby of gorgeous sandy-blonde. Baby has coughing bout. Mummy whips out stethoscope on baby; then on me. I receive SMS 'early-onset pulmonary dermatory poisoning ha ha' [dermatory not a real word].

Me: I take it you're a respiratory doctor? [also not recognised med lingo]
Hot Mum: Yes.
Me: Every doctor I see has a different theory about my problematic lungs. I've never heard of 'early-onset pulmonary dermatory poisoning'.
HM: That should give you an idea of what bad shape you're in. Very little is known about this condition.
Me: What does it mean for me exactly?
HM: You die.
Me: ... Don't we all.